John August

QandA

Dialogue versus exposition

QandA, Words on the page

What is a good way to distiguish good dialogue from exposition?

— Josh Hatfield

Dialogue:

FRANK

Let’s say we try to keep the dysfunction indoors, huh?

Exposition:

O’MALLEY

Thompson was a down-on-his-luck bookie who thought he could swindle Ackland out of the ticket profits. He wasn’t counting on Rickman having the same idea.

Always ask yourself: Would the character actually say this, or is he only saying it because you need the audience to know some fact or detail? If the answer is the latter, you’re writing exposition and not dialogue.

That’s not good.

At its worst, you risk “M Syndrome,” named for the James Bond boss whose sole function seems to be telling 007 all the backstory so he knows who to shoot. (This was parodied in the Austin Powers movies by Michael York’s character, Basil Exposition.)

Honestly, there are times when you really do need to have a character say something that’s purely plot. In certain genres, like police procedurals, exposition is pretty much par for the course. But to the degree possible, try to avoid situations where characters are spouting information.

Wherever possible:

  1. Show the information, rather than having a character say it.
  2. Try to follow a natural line of thought: A to B to C.
  3. Simplify. The reader may not need to know everything.
  4. Keep your hero active in learning the information, rather than passively listening.
  5. Balance natural speech patterns with efficiency. People rarely say things as concisely as they could.

Avoiding exposition is hard, especially in plot-dependent stories. But it’s one of the first things a reader notices, so spend the time to deal with it.

Formatting a reality show proposal

Formatting, QandA, Television

How should a proposal for a reality show be structured? My research to date suggests that reality shows have been evolving towards a more “scripted” format, although I understand that writers don’t get credited (yet).

I have an idea for a reality show (doesn’t everyone, eh?) – so how should it be presented to a producer? An overall description of the premise, and ideas for several episodes? What level of detail is needed (or not needed)?

— Jedd
New Orleans, LA

There are already too many reality TV shows, which are taking jobs away from writers. So I won’t answer your question.
.
.
.
Okay, I will. But you have to promise your show will be something inspiring like the Amazing Race and not soul-destroying like, well, anything that starts with My Big Fat Obnoxious Dot-Dot-Dot.

There’s nothing approaching a standard format for something like a reality TV show, or, surprisingly, a scripted show. In the Downloads section, you’ll see my initial write-ups for The Circle. The format seems pretty standard and straightforward, but I wasn’t trying to match any template. I just wrote what I thought needed to be explained.

For your reality show, I think the proposal would need to include:

  1. The premise
  2. The people (host, contestants, whatever)
  3. The tone, including some sample dialogue/narration if appropriate
  4. The reward or outcome
  5. Structure of a typical episode
  6. Future episode descriptions

I think you need to present enough detail so that the producer really understands what the show is, and how it differs from anything else on television. If you have a background in physical production, you might include more detail about shooting days, crew or locations, but if you don’t know, don’t try to fake it.

Getting sidetracked by other movies

Psych 101, QandA

I have this problem of losing my momentum when I’m writing due to shifts in my mood. I’ll be working on a pretty heavy dramatic piece and I’ll see something like a Wes Anderson film. If the film moves me enough, my overall mood will become whimsical (in this example) and I’ll lose that dramatic edge.

Does this ever happen to you? If so, what do you, outside of sealing yourself off from outside artistic influences (which may not be a bad idea)?

— Brandon
Los Angeles

Yes, this happens to me, and just about every writer I know. The problem is that screenplays are simply so long, and take so long to write, that it’s impossible to remain in one emotional state from start to finish.

All I can offer are some tricks to help you get back in the right mood.

  1. Be an actor. Scene by scene, day by day, actors have to project emotions that they’re not naturally feeling. How do they do it? Well, you could and should read up on it — even taking a class is a good idea. But the short version is that they simply pretend. If you’re feeling glum and depressed as you sit down to work on your elephant-mating comedy, pretend you’re having a great day, and that you’re surrounded by people who think you’re funny. On the other hand, I wrote the finale for BIG FISH by deliberately bringing myself to tears before I started typing. Call it method screenwriting.

  2. Create some triggers. While I don’t usually write with music playing, I often build an iTunes playlist of songs that feel right for a certain project. For instance, Ennio Morricone’s Hamlet soundtrack has a very spooky song that I used over and over when I needed to get properly freaked out for my never-to-be-made zombie western.

  3. Acknowledge what it is about that Wes Anderson film you liked so much, but stop comparing it to what you’re writing. You know what? Wes Anderson goes to see movies, too, and probably feels the same kind of self-doubt when he sees something brilliant. But he gets over it. So get over it.

  4. Re-read what you’ve already written. Nothing feels more like your movie than your movie.

  5. Finally, do consider barricading yourself for a week or two if outside influences are keeping you from finishing. There’s a lot to be said for keeping other voices out of your head.

Pay-for-mentoring, part two

Film Industry, QandA

Many of the questions I answer on this site also show up in the “Ask a Filmmaker” section of IMDb. Heather Campbell, who edits that section, forwarded me an email concerning programs where you pay money to be matched with a mentor in the film industry, an issue I had written about here.

Here is one guy’s experience. I don’t know if this was the same “Get a Mentor” program I wrote about, but it sounds similar:

A couple of weeks ago someone wrote you about mentoring
programs. I happen to have some experience with the one
they’re referring to. I own a very successful film and
video production company in Connecticut now for over 15
years.

A couple of years ago this company called and asked us if
we would let one of their students hang around a couple of
hours a week and let him assist us. It would not cost us a
cent and if we would do this for them they would send us a
check for $1000.

Well low and behold we never got the check for a thousand
dollars and the poor kid had paid them like 2 or 3 grand.
Needless to say I would of hired the kid as an intern
anyway and he could of saved the money he gave to these
people.

— John Michaels
Connecticut

Once again, caveat mentor.