QandA

I’ve received a couple million dollars to write and direct my own picture. I am in doubt as to whether or not I have the talent to pull it off.

I hear writers always talking about horrible writers and great writers. Does that actually exist? If so, what is it that makes great writers great and bad writers bad?

Also do you feel that in order to write an amazing screenplay your knowledge of grammar and your size of vocabulary are important factors? I feel that vocabulary and grammar are my weaknesses. However, I continue to think what Ron Howard once said that, “Your screenplay should make sense to an eight year old.”

In stating that, what is the most important thing for me to work on? My lack of grammar knowledge? Or my lack of vocabulary? Or do these two factors have any relevance at all to a screenplay? To sum up, what should I be focusing on?

— Matt
via imdb

You should focus on being very careful as you cross the street, because I suspect there are several hundred aspiring writer-directors reading this right now who might “accidentally” run you over. That’s why I’m not printing your last name.

Seriously, Matt. “I’ve received a couple million dollars to write and direct my own picture.” Did you win the lottery? Rob a bank? Blackmail some rich old guy?

I ask because you clearly didn’t get it by any ordinary means. See, most people don’t get to write and direct a multi-million dollar film out of the gate. Rather, they write a few scripts. Direct a charming short film. They do something that proves to the People With Millions to Spend that this young writer-director is worth the investment.

No offense, but that doesn’t sound like you, Matt.

The only reasonable scenario I could envision is if you’re actually tremendously talented in one of the other filmmaking crafts, and are now getting to direct for the first time. Maybe you’re a terrific production designer like Bo Welch, or an acclaimed cinematographer like Jack Green. Could be.

Or maybe you’re just really effing lucky.

Regardless, if someone is giving you several million to direct your own picture, make sure you don’t let them see this self-doubt. More than anything, the money people want confidence.

As to your actual question: Does grammar or vocabulary have any relevance to a screenplay? Um, yeah. A fair amount. It’s easy to get a smart person to help with your grammar. Vocabulary is tougher. I’d advise against a thesaurus, however. In my experience, they’re helpful in finding exactly the wrong word for the situation.

If you’re really in doubt, the best idea might be to spend some fraction of those several million dollars on a screenwriter with a strong grasp of grammar and vocabulary. (Along with character, dialogue, structure, pacing, atmosphere, tone and theme. Those help, too.)

For what it’s worth, good luck. I really don’t begrudge anyone getting to make their movie.

A couple of weeks ago Pastor moon spoke on the Genealogy of Jesus from Matthew. There’s another one in Luke, in this one Joseph’s father is given a very different name from the Matthew text. Can you give an explanation as to why this is so?

— Liam

Um, Liam. Are we quite clear on the concept of this site?

The tagline at the top of the page reads, “A ton of useful information about screenwriting.” There is no mention of Jesus or testaments (new or old).

Maybe you were looking for John August Swanson, an artist who deals with religious themes.

Anyway, you’re here now, so let me try my best to answer your question.

The Bible, the book you’re holding in your hand? Contrary to what a lot of people assume, it was written by a bunch of different people, over a very long period of time. Unlike the important texts of certain religions (c.f. Scientology), the information didn’t all come through one person. It’s natural that multiple storytellers might disagree on certain details.

As centuries passed, different texts were added and removed, and there’s always been controversy about these decisions. Plus, not a word of the Bible was written in English, so you’re always dealing with translation issues.

For these reasons, many people would say that what’s important is the larger themes, rather than a certain person’s name.

If your Pastor Moon says the Bible is the word of God, make sure he clarifies exactly what he means. Some Christian scholars will say the Bible is divinely inspired, which to me is an elegant way of addressing the human role in putting thought to parchment.

I hope this helps. If you’re still frustrated by the contradictions in the text, you might prefer a more free-form religion like Flying Spaghetti Monsterism.